Mr. Efficiency

There's only one thing that doesn't get me mad when I look at a pile of work that is bigger at the end of the day than at the beginning. At least I can be content knowing I am not ruining the environment. Otherwise, my time wasting is the equivalent of the moms who pick up their three-year-old at preschool in a Suburban. Fuel, like time, is not a renewable resource, but at least all that time I send up in smoke doesn't end up melting the polar ice caps.

Otherwise, I hate this. I find it virtually impossible to get the power to the ground on days like today. The track is slick, and I'm feathering the clutch and taking pressure out of the tires, but we're still slipping and sliding, transfering only tiny fractions of the horsepower created to mother earth.

First inefficient project is this weekend's AMA Sports banquet. Friday's banquet is very fun-it's the amateur side of racing. Sunday's banquet is for the pros. What's the difference? This is one of the confusing aspects of the AMA about 1% of fans actually understand. Let me try here: AMA Racing, formerly known as AMA Pro Racing, covers the very very very top series under the AMA umbrella--AMA Supercross and the AMA Toyota Motocross Series (Stewart/Reed/Langston et al.) , AMA Superbike (Spies/Mladin), AMA Supermoto (Wardy) AMA Dirt Track (Chris Carr) and now AMA ATV Motocross (Joe Byrd). That's it. Those are the series covered by AMA Racing. Everything else is considered amateur, meaning yes, even if you race the "pro class" anywhere else, it's still part of AMA Sports, the amateur side, not AMA Racing, the pro side. GNCC guys, for example, go to AMA Sports, same with the trials guys, hillcimbing and stuff like that.

But that makes the AMA Sports banquet really fun, with a lot less pressure. When you get to the AMA Racing level, everything is way more highly produced, way more scheduled and everyone has all these carefully prepared speeches.

The best way I can illustrate the difference between the two banquets: I wrote the script for the AMA banquet on Friday, and I'm hosting it along with Tim Cotter. For Sunday's banquet, I'm just hoping to score a ticket. That should give you an idea of the level we're talking about.

Unfortunately writing that script was much harder than I expected. When I was done turning the '06 script into the '07 script, it totaled nearly 10,000 words and 47 pages. BY FAR the longest paper I've ever had my name attached to (just ask my Graduate Seminar professor, who has been waiting seven years for me to turn in my thesis so I can finally get that Master's Degree).

That script nearly killed me. I had to learn so much about all of these crazy sports. Did you know the AMA holds a "Loretta's" type event for nearly every sport, from road racing to dirt track to hillclimbing? Did you know they hold a Champions Cup race in amateur road race where three-rider teams vie for wins (imagine having team races between all the rivalries at Loretta's). Did you know they have a 50cc 4-6 dirt track class? Sidecar motocross racing has a national championship?

At 2 am last night my eyes fell out. One landed on the CTRL key and the other on the S. I had saved the document for the last time. 47 pages of updates later, I was done.

But I had to get up early this morning so I could get measured for a tux, and then register for one to be delivered at the Rio Hotel on Friday. Then it was into the back recording studio here at the office where I do GNCC TV Voice Overs (announcing), only today I thought it would be wise to use a real editing program so I can learn how video editing works. I usually just use a very user-friendly audio program, but I wanted to learn, so I used the much-more complex Adobe Premiere and spent 6 hours doing a project that normally lasts less than one. Then we had the kids in the office today (anyone who works here is free to bring their kids in here and plop them in front of the TV) and that means you will get NO work done. Jessica and Timmy's son Cade rolled into my office and started punching keys on the keyboard of my laptop, and ironically enough the F key popped off. By the time I had remounted it, I had cooled off enough to where I didn't use it writing this post.

But the little guy didn't help clean off my desk, which has a pile of work on it much larger than the one that was there this morning.